Have you ever listened to a song and was immediately shook by its lyrics? I'll never forget the first time I listened to the Casting Crowns song "Slow Fade". There is one line in particular that pierced right through me:
“Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattering leads to compromises, the end is always near.”
This line can be interpreted many different ways, but for teenage me it rang in my ears as a warning. A warning not to let the flattery of boys manipulate me into doing what they wanted.
As humans we crave attention, especially as malleable young women. We constantly look for validation. From our peers, from the opposite sex, from our parents, and just about everyone we meet in life. So when we get the attention of the Peter Kavinsky in our life, our fluttered little heart speak louder than our logical mind. We make irrational decisions that make us scratch our heads later and shout “What was I thinking?!”
When I was in middle school there was a boy who was intrigued with something about me. He began flirting, I began flirting back. He asked for my phone number. I was reluctant to give it to him. After all, my strict parents would kill me if they found out I was talking to boys on the phone (this is way before texting existed). I eventually gave in, but saved his number under a girl's name of course. Phone calls filled with sweet talk blurred my senses and I let my guard down. One thing led to another and we “hung out.” You can use your imagination here, but don’t go that far. Eventually my parents found out (in retrospect, thank God they did and put an end to it). I remember being terrified, embarrassed, and regretful all at once. I had a boy lure me to compromising my values, a decision I take full responsibility for. I had “ruined my reputation.” Something I had been warned about a hundred times in Sunday School not to do. Luckily, if you believe in the power of repentance and God's grace there is no such thing as a ruined reputation.
The chorus of that Casting Crowns song repeats “It's a slow fade when you give yourself away.” That is how Satan gets us. Slowly. With baby steps. So it could start out as an innocent Instagram DM, followed by a few flirty Snapchats, and turns into sexting. Which can become haunting blackmail when you break up.
All for what? Really, ask yourself that. The best advice I ever read as a teenager was from one of those Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul books. It went something like this: never do something where the risk is greater then the reward. So ask yourself again, what is this all for and is it worth my purity?
Hey girl, know your self-worth! Know that you are fearfully and wonderfully made! I want you to read Psalm 139 over and over again until it becomes like a song stuck in your head on repeat. Or if you need an actual song, go listen to "You Say" by Lauren Daigle. Get to know what He thinks of you, and what any boy thinks of you will hold no value.